You ever get the fucking idiot customers in your retail work place who make it look like YOU'RE the fucking idiot who doesn't know how to do his/her job? For example, you are used to the constant prats who, while planning to go get a rental movie and in the end before even getting out of their seat have the full INTENTION of going out to rent this movie, forget their freaking membership card(s). The worst ones are those who have a dozen and yet don't even think about leaving one in their wallet/purse.
Now granted, we can't expect everyone to keep track of everything. That's because they're incompetent and deep down we're laughing hard at the misfortune that they misplaced their child's school trip money a day before the flight. But when they approach you with their rentals, this point can go one of two ways.

Either:-

1) "I forgot my card." They say the moment the conversation starts.
2) You ask for their card and suddenly they jump back in surprise thinking out loud "Oh shit, I forgot it!"

Okay, #1 is fair enough. They had the decency to acknowledge this before they even made it to the till and have the common courtesy to let you know before the transaction even begins. Now you're prepared. But the bloody morons in #2 are just freaking wankers. All that time thinking about it at home, getting up, walking/biking/driving to the store, walking around like a bloody twit, picking up and looking over DVDs to find the 18 age/M rated tits, misplace it in the freaking popcorn bin then look elsewhere, pick another one, walk over to the queue, spend 20 minutes in the line, become the next guest on "who wants to be a freaking prick?" at the till and the moment we ask for their card it suddenly SNAPS with them that "Oh fuck, I'm a complete tosser, I forgot my sodding membership card!"

I barely tolerate #1 because they at least know about it and either they tell you first or when you ask them, they'll just let you know. But the bloody prats who keel back like their spine became dislocated and the twats that fondle and scramble around in their wallets/bags for a few minutes to say "oh crap" are just impossible. But hey, I haven't even gotten close to the punchline yet. While you already acknowledge that #1 and #2 are morons anyway, it's not the end of the world. You can still look them up on the system providing they share the right details with you. Now this can go one of FOUR ways.

1) You ask them for their details step by step so both of you can keep up and you'll bring up their account faster. These kind of people are the most common types.
2) They'll go step by step with you, making sure you type in the right details first before moving onto the next set. They are the typical breed that are used to being retarded by leaving their cards so far up their own arse it would take a surgeon to find it.
3) They'll suddenly blurt out every single detail like you're fucking Speedy Gonzales. These ones aren't as common but DAMN they're annoying when you're the unfortunate sod cursed with handling them. You tell them either "Sorry, stop. Can you say that slower?" or "Shut the fuck up, prat!" Sadly the workspace demands you ask the former as the latter would result in a sudden boot up your buttocks.
4) After you ask them, they treat it like they're being interrogated by the gods damn MI5 or FBI. Suddenly it sounds illegal for you to ask the fucking security questions for them to access THEIR account on YOUR system!

#1 and #2 at least have what sounds like common sense. They know you're only human and you haven't got reflexes equivalent to the God Damn Batman. #3 makes you want to reach for the nearest tape or stapler (the latter is my preference) and see to it they never want to open those god damn lips again. #4, while the rarest, does happen and will have you screaming in your own head and spreading gasoline on the flames of desire to yank the computer screen from the till and smash it over their fucking heads.

Once the account is up, you'd think the worst was over. But ooooh no. This one's possibly the most INCREDIBLY infuriating. The account is up, but this is where the Hand of God gambles at Hell's Casino. This could go a multitude of ways but we'll only touch on a few.

1) The account is up and ready to go. There is nothing that shows up, it's just ready for you to scan their rentals and god knows what junk food so they can go on their merry way and have you free of the gremlins for the next 5 seconds.
2) The system throws up some retarded question about out of date credit card details. You don't really give a shit because it's pointless considering they pay with their cards on a different machine anyway.
3) Before you can get to scanning the moment the account flickers on, it suddenly disappears and leaves you with an edit screen on the account, giving you the option to change any detail you wish.
4) The customers decide to piss you off by deciding to either do the following:

I) Wander off in search of another film while you're left confused about where they sodded off to.
II) Give you the rentals then wait till you're done with whatever deal you believe they're intending to take before giving you some vouchers on a COMPLETELY DIFFERENT deal!
III) Bitch that the movie/game you're selling them was priced lower than what it's coming up on the system as and don't want to part ways with that extra 2 fucking quid.
IV) Decide to swap one of the DVDs you already scanned for something else, then decide to swap ANOTHER one again 5 minutes later!
V) Like IV, but they do all this AFTER you served them and are in the middle of serving someone else.
VI) Get incredibly infuriating when they either treat you like the moron for not having the right contact details (even though they're the ones who wrote those same details on that membership form) or question YOU as to why you should have their contact details.

I... Can't even begin to express my hate. #1 is good because it makes you feel like the world loves you and wants you to have as good a day as possible. #2 and #3 are like having someone butting into your work while you're trying to do your job. #2 is easier to get out of because it just takes a simple press of the Enter key to get out of it but #3 not only takes forever to get out of but even longer when you've just scanned a bar code the moment it shows up. And why even bring up the edit screen automatically? If we intended to edit something, WE'LL DO IT MANUALLY OURSELVES! But as if the system wasn't bad enough, #4 is like one giant grocery list on how to fuck up your day the worst. If there's any I truly cannot even begin to tolerate, it's IV and V. Because they couldn't make up their mind around the searching and waiting in queue till you start to serve the fuckers.

You ever get those kind of people?

Thank the goddess I don't...